Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The FARNies!

Happy 1-year anniversary to my blog! I am celebrating it by live blogging over at KSJ ESPN's Midnight Madness. Oh, and studying for an exam as well. Yeah, forgot about that part. Anyways, here is myself heaping praise upon myself boring my readers to tears because I can't control my own ego are your winners!

The best live blog goes to.......

Other! List in comments section!

Well, only one was listed, and seeing as I think it's still active, I'll link to it anyway, ladies and gentlemen, the mun2 Mexico-USA live blog open thread!

I miss Guadelupe.

And now the reward for best rant.

In a somewhat surprising no contest. The winner is........

My rant after the Deadskins loss!

This weekend was the absolute perfect weekend. Perfect. Everything went beautifully. Beautifully. This was gonna be it. The week where Philadelphia magic once again happened. Everything was so beautifully laid out.

Too beautifully laid out. It was too easy. Everything was there and now it's come and gone. Dallas got humiliated the last game at Texas Stadium, Tampa Bay lost. Yeah, the Bucs lost! That's what the Eagles needed. This was going to be the greatest day in Philadelphia sports since Wednesday, October 29, 2008! All the Eagles needed to do was beat the Redskins. The measly Redskins who have been laying a turds in their last 6 games.........

The Eagles were the ones who laid the turd. It was all nice and polished as well. When the Eagles knew that they could win out and get in the playoffs with a Tampa loss, what happened? I, I'm speechless. HOW IN THE BLUE HELL DO YOU PLAY LIKE THAT WHEN YOU KNOW THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS WIN OUT?!?!?!

The Detroit Lions, despite being 0-15 and getting blown out by New Orleans, looked like a more competent football team. No wait, I take that back. The Detroit Lions' offense was more competent than the Eagles' offense.

Eagles fan couldn't have been happier with the play of the defense. Time after time the Redskins would get the ball at midfield and time and time again the Skins went 3-and out. At least half of the team showed up. At least half of the team wanted to win. At least half of the team cared.

Cared. That's the keyword. Where was the passion from the offense? Where? What happened? There was no life. Balls were dropped left and right and right and left. McNabb constantly threw behind his receivers. It's as if they were going through the motions. Like they didn't want to be there.

And they couldn't have been happier with where they ended up playing! Look, not everyone can end up in sunny, 70 degree, Tampa Bay, but did they not realize how lucky they were! Teams ended up playing in snow. The weather in Kansas City was 10 degrees. The kickoff temperature tonight in Chicago is 5 degrees! 5 DEGREES! FAHRENHEIT! Comparitively speaking, the weather last night in Landover, MD was 41 degrees at kickoff.

So what was the problem then? Why? Why play like garbage in the game you need most? Why throw away everything you got back after tying the Bengals and getting creamed by the Redskins? Why? Somebody please tell me why.

As much as I want to start the "FIRE ANDY REID!" chant for abandoning the run in the second half, the offense was just as futile in the 1st half when they were running the ball. But alas, we all know Andy Reid. That being said, though, he's not off the hook. I don't even need to watch his press conferences to know what he said. I'm sure it was something along the lines of, "It was my fault." or "I have to do a better job at getting our team prepared." or "We got outplayed by a better team" or "I was really craving a cheesesteak at the time and couldn't concentrate."

Okay, that last one was meant as a joke. But what happened last night was not a joke? Do you really expect, Coach Reid, that you can please Philadelphians with that kind of performance. Do can you, sir, honestly be proud of yourself? Can you be proud of the Eagles? Do you honestly feel, sir, that the Eagles gave it 100% last night. And lastly, and maybe most important of all, can you, Coach Andrew Walter Reid, look yourself in the mirror and not be ashamed of yourself? If you can, then you should never coach another game in the NFL again.
I honestly think that was the most pissed I ever was over a result while doing this blog, so in a way, I'm happy it won. Of course, we all know how that whole scenario turned out, but good grief that Week 16 game was pathetic to watch.

Moving on to posts less about me.

The best moment of porn goes to.........

A 3-WAY TIE!!!!!!!!!!

Ernie "Keep Fucking That Chicken" Arnastos, Super Bowl porn in Tuscon, Arizona, and the Hurricane fan are all winners! So now, sit back, relax, and if you're into this kind of stuff, get hard! (don't worry; nothing is R or X-rated)





Good stuff.

And now for a real moment of TMI, I actually saw the unedited Super Bowl porn clip and frankly, I am yet to figure out how that guy got that job. The porn industry must be on a tiny decline, if you know what I mean.

And now an award we can all relate too, the douche bag of the year award! This award is for not only being a douche but for having douchiness on top of the already douchy douchiness that you possess. And your winner is........

Keith Olbermann!

Kidding. Obviously. Not even the infamous, deplorable Olbermann comes anywhere close on the level of douchiness as the obvious winner (although not as obvious as I thought it would be, which was unanimous)........

Officer Robert Powell.

As a reminder, watch this again.




As much as I bash Olbermann, Fuckface Jones, and Cowherd here, not even them combined come close to the level of douchiness of Powell.

And lastly, the most prostegious award of them all: The Golden Mic. The winner of the Golden Mic Award is..........


PAMMY!!!!!!!!!!



The parity was too much and she eeked out a victory 2-1-1-1.

Well, those are your FARNies for the year. And while not up for any award, I leave with what I personally feel is the overall video of the year.



9 months later and I still have not gotten an answer to the simple question of what.......the..........hell?

1 comment:

  1. That was a really tough break for Ireland this afternoon...

    ReplyDelete

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